Creepy Outback Cryptid Critters...

Nearly every country has at least one story of a mythical or unexplainable creature. Having been separated from any nearby land some 48,000 years ago, Australia is naturally a place of exotic and bizarre animals many of which are found nowhere else on earth. The kangaroo, koala, and platypus were demystified by European colonization but there are other mysteries based on stories passed down by Aboriginal peoples which today remain unidentified beasts of legendary proportions.

Probably the best known cryptid said to roam across the continent is the Yowie: Australia's very own version of Bigfoot (a.k.a. Sasquatch). Named Narcoonah by natives in what is now South Australia this large hairy ape-like creature has reportedly been sighted by white settlers since the 1840s. As more towns sprung up across the country sightings continued to increase and still happen today. It is believed there are at least two "species" of Yowie ranging from the small 4-5 foot tall hominids to enormous 6-10 foot varieties. Yowie researchers believe it's possible that these creatures are some distant ancestor to Gigantopithecus which was native to China around 1 million years ago, intermingled with ancient man, and may have crossed a land bridge to arrive in Terra Australis.

As with reports of Bigfoot, Yeti, and similar creatures scientists say it's impossible for such a large creature to remain unknown and not result in at least one discovery of a carcass over the past few hundred years. That hasn't stopped countless people and researchers from trying to track the elusive animal. Australian Yowie Research and Australian Yowie Research Centre are a few of the many organizations dedicated to collecting reported sightings and hunting for evidence. Josh Gates of Destination Truth even went to Queensland in 2008 to try to hunt down the creature. But so far the only evidence anyone has produced is footprint casts, odd audio recordings, and unidentified images. You would be hard pressed to even find one of the Cadbury variety these days.

But mysterious creatures are not only confined to land. To the north of Sydney lies the Hawkesbury River, known by Aboriginals as Deerrubbun. It has been a popular spot for thousans of years where the Ku Ring Gui and Dharug tribes believed the Dream Time was found. Prized for its abundant seafood the Hawkesbury might hold another aquatic animal. It's said to be the home of a prehistoric monster.

Similar to Scotland's Loch Ness Monster, the Mirreeulla (or "giant water serpent") was introduced by the Dharuk to early settlers through stories of capsized canoes and vessels blamed on a monster of the deep. It's been described in cave art and recollections as a large bodied animal with two sets of flippers,an eel-like tail, and the head of a snake mounted on a long neck—like a living plesiosaur would be envisioned. Reports of the creature happened throughout the 20th century. More recent sightings have occurred in August 2009 and March 2010.

But there are so many others. The legend of a very peculiar creature called the bunyip. Reports of black panthers. Sightings of extinct animals in Tasmania. Australia is a land of oddities, both known and unknown. Who knows what the next fishing line will pull out of a New South Wales waterway? Or what glint of an animal will be caught in car headlights?

Hairy Hominid Homosexuals?

It's the furry "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy of which most people balk at the slightest mention. No, I'm not talking about the bears and cubs of the human gay community. Or even sexual behavior among primates. This time it's Bigfoot.

In his book Bigfoot!: The True Story of Apes in America, cryptozoologist Loren Coleman states, "Frankly, the subject of sex and the Sasquatch is avoided. Never mentioned are Bigfoot bestiality, Sasquatch penises, and that more human males than human females have traditionally been kidnapped by Bigfoot." There have been some reports of encounters involving some sexual overtones and he makes some references to Jan Klement's first-hand accounts of his interaction with a Sasquatch in his book The Creature: Personal Experiences with Bigfoot.

According to Klement, on one occasion he noticed "Kong" (as he had named the animal) sporting a difficult-to-conceal erection and being a bit fearful of what he might be capable of he yelled at the Sasquatch to get it away from him. A short while later he noticed something in the distance. "“As I approached the bottom of the hill I could see the cows on the pasture on the other hillside," he wrote. "There was a commotion among the cows and I when I put the water jug down and walked over I could see Kong. He was mounted on a large Holstein cow and was shoving away.” Upon seeing such a sight (obviously it can't be called "beastiality"... perhaps "inter-species relations" is better) his first thought was probably, "Better Bessie than me!"

During an April 7, 2001 lecture at the 13th Annual Bigfoot Conference / Bigfoot EXPO 2001 in Newcomerstown, Ohio Coleman lightheartedly remarked that he wondered if "10 percent of the Bigfoot population, matching the figures we have for Homo sapiens, might be gay." That one statement was blasted out of proportion my the media with claims Loren stated, "Bigfoot is gay." In all fairness, it was an interesting thought. With so many animals in the world showing signs of homosexual interaction and intercourse, why not? If the creature is, in fact, real it's certainly a valid question.

But of course, many people have turned the exaggerated misquote into a point of heckling. Soon after his appearance he received angry mail from people outraged that he could make such remarks... even though many hadn't even been there to know exactly what was said. Some people started calling him a "homo", "gay", and that perennial favorite: "f*g". But in 2007, some people in cryptozoological circles showed a little more ignorance when a few women expressed interest in Bigfoot and unexplained creatures. One female blogger was told that women "don't want to get involved in Bigfoot research because they’re afraid of the woods." A few other comments were made toward a few such women that they "must be lesbians."

Yes, that's right. Ghost hunting isn't the sole domain of sexist and homophobic remarks. While all of this isn't exactly recent news it helps show that in light of some recent events, nothing has really changed. Isn't the point of researching, investigating, and pursuing claims of ghosts, UFOs, Bigfoot, and other unexplainable phenomena to unite people in a quest for truth and knowledge? Or have we all regressed into caged chimps too busy flinging feces at each other?

What a Strange World, Indeed...

It's been a while since I've taken a break to glance over some of the unusual (and often less-depressing) news from around the world. To be honest, it's been more difficult these days to find enough amusing news with a creepy twist. I blame the economy. It's making people far too serious. But never fear; I've scrounged the internet for

The Sweet Thrill of Blood-Sucking...

There's a sanguineous creature lurking in Puerto Rico. But this isn't your ordinary Chupacabra tale. Locals near Guánica fear a nocturnal winged phantom believed to be a gargoyle. As he/she/it has been so named, "the Gargoyle" is believed to be responsible for a series of attacks on living creatures and one human being. Livestock victims look oddly similar to the Chupacabra corpses with slashed throats. Mr. Valdo was attacked near Guánica Lagoon nearly 15 years ago by a large, winged creature leaving severe claw marks on his back and abdomen. The "Gargoyle" is described as a very large bird-like creature which smells strongly of sulfur (doesn't EVERY vicious cryptid?) and attacks healthy animals, draining them of blood.

Like any night-flying monster, it is believed to have a lair. Only a few months ago, Officer Miguel Negrón heard loud, powerful wings beating and the scratching of tin roof at the old abandoned Guánica Sugar Mill. Oh, sweet sanctuary! Let's see: we have an unexplained creature terrorizing locals, an abandoned building, a creepy tropical location... it almost sounds like an episode of Scooby Doo come to life!

Don't Speak in Tongues and Drive...

Everywhere, people seem to love spending copious amounts of money for personalizing the plates on their cars. Yet one woman in Sweden was denied her choice in vehicular statements. Law requires any request to be examined, ruling out anything deemed "offensive" or inappropriate. "Luzifer" didn't make the cut. Annsofie Tedfors hadn't intended to cause a major heated debate. It was both the name of her business and beloved feline and she "just wanted to pick a memorable name". But as they say, the Devil is in the details...

Répondez S'il Vous Plaît...

Josiane Vermeersch was unable to contact her son regarding the death of his uncle. Believing he was merely ignoring her after an argument over the summer, she attended the funeral near Lilles with the rest of her family. While leaving the cemetery one one of them noticed a new, wooden grave marker nearby in the poor section bearing the son's name and date of birth. Josiane collapsed from shock. The son, Olivier, passed away from natural causes over a month prior. Just a little reminder not to go to dead angry...

When Psychic Vision Isn't 20/20...

Australians have been eager to solve the disappearance of six-year-old Sydney-sider Kiesha Abrahams since she vanished around the beginning of August. Weeks later, an Aboriginal elder named Cheryl Carroll-Lagerwey had a dream about Kieska's murder and believed she knew the location of her body. Police began their search at the specified location at Nurragingy Reserve and discovered the dismembered body of an adult female. The victim is believed to be another Sydney woman who went missing in June. In all fairness, Carroll-Lagerwey does not believe herself to be psychic but does feel she has "a third sense". She told a Reuters reporter, "I have certain strong feelings about people who claim they are psychic. I don't think it will help if we enter a discussion on that."

Save a Horse, Ride a Centaur...

More than a few of us have dated a jackass, but usually it's not something meant literally. Though to some, that idea just might be appealing. But in these instances, we hardly even consider the possibility that it could lead to a half-human newborn. It's simply impossible, right? Well, as bizarre as it may sound, some experts say that not only is it plausible, but it may be a real part of history for thousands of years.

In 2005, a study of approximately 5,000 rock paintings in South Africa and Australia dating as early as 30,000 BC by University of Cambridge anthropologist Christopher Chippendale and Dr. Paul Takon of the Australian Museum led the duo to a fascinating conclusion: primitive man lacked the imagination to paint what he could not see, therefore such creatures must have existed. In their new visualization of early man, our ancestors walked the earth alongside these half human beings, known collectively as therianthropes. They surmised that while the frequency and chance occurrence of such births would have been rare, the "beasts" from mythology most likely did exist.

The most famous examples come from Greek mythology. The centaur (from Ancient Greek Κένταυροι or Kéntauroi, meaning "piercing bull-stickers") was half-human, half-horse and is seen even today as an iconic image of mythical creatures, as well as the symbol of Sagittarius in astrology. Soldiers during ancient times would bring sheep and goats with them as both a source of food and sexual relief, since it was deemed less sinful than sleeping with a prostitute (my goodness, how times have changed). The Roman poet Juvenal even made mention that "Roman women often exposed their naked buttocks to tempt donkeys into sex contacts."

Well-respected scholars of the past, including the Italian lecturer and philosopher Fortunio Liceti, recorded several births of therianthropes (both born from humans and animals). Even in more recent history, mentions of half-human births were found in medical books of the 19th and 20th centuries. Although genetically-speaking, animals and humans vary only slightly, modern science held out for some time on the belief that interbreeding was even feasible, yet experiments are said to have resulted in successfully creating organisms with both human and animal cells.

So, could your next boyfriend be a centaur or girlfriend be the REAL cat-woman? Not very likely. Russian biologist Ilya Ivanovich Ivanov attempted such experiments during the 1920s and all his attempts were thwarted before his eventual exile to Almaty due to public outcry. Beastiality, even in the name of science, is seriously frowned upon by the general population. Yet who knows? Perhaps in some remote land, far from societal pressures and taboos, any one of us could very well find a four-legged, two armed man of our dreams who is quite literally hung like a horse.

You Can't Keep a Good Gnome Down...

Some of you may remember the "creepy gnome" of Argentina sighted earlier this year and the infamous video circulating the web. It was later determined to be a hoax, though the teen responsible for that footage, Jose Alvarez, still claims it was real.

But now, the creepy gnome tale has resurfaced. Footage was recorded in early October of a "midget monster" near a water fountain in Clodomira, filmed by Juan Carlos Roldan and friends on a mobile phone.

“We were messing about - singing and dancing - when we heard a loud rustling noise from behind us. This tiny thing started running down Avenue San Martin at us. It had a pointy head and dark clothes," said one of the teenage witnesses.

“This little thing was barking like a dog, but running sideways on two legs. It headed off towards the football stadium.”

A photographic expert from Universidad Nacional de Santiago del Estero has reviewed the footage and believes it could be authentic. Aldegonda Alvarz hasn't found any obvious trickery.

Should Argentina be renamed "Munchkin Land" or is it in fact an animal or little person playing a prank, as skeptics allege? Watch the footage and judge for yourself:

An American Werewolf in Defiance...

Some thirty years ago, a mystery perplexed the town of Defiance, Ohio, west of Toledo. Railroad workers reported run-ins with an assailant along the tracks in town. They were attacked by what was described as a werewolf.

In early August 1972, local newspapers were buzzing over the police hunt for a "wolfman" along the Norfolk and Western tracks. Three separate incidents near Fifth Street had taken place within the span of a week. A tall figure with an "animal-like head" crept from the wooded area and went after people with a two-by-four. While two victims escaped, one railroad worker was struck on the shoulder and received minor injuries. All of the attacks occurred between 1:30 AM and 4:30 AM.

Hysteria quickly swept the town. Residents contacted authorities out of fear. Many had not witnessed the creature, but felt sure they were being watched or in imminent danger. One woman notified authorities that every night at 2:00 AM, something rattled her door knob. Another phoned police to say there was something scratching at her door and "if anything cane through it, [she would] shoot it".

According to some witnesses, the werewolf wore blue jeans and a dark shirt. He was said to have hairy feet, fangs, and a caveman-like canter. While police considered it a rather nasty prank, they took al reports seriously after the injury sustained by the railroad worker.

Just as suddenly as the "creature" appeared on July 25th, the reports ceased around mid-August. To this day, the identity of the "werewolf" remains an enigma. Suspects were ruled out but no one was ever apprehended. No one has since stepped forward proclaiming to have been the perpetrator.

Perhaps on nights lit by the full moon, there is still a creature lingering in the shadows throughout northwestern Ohio. Or perhaps, buried in a box within an attic near town sits a dusty wolf mask and a pair of hairy slippers...

It Was a Monster Mash...

First bigfoot, now El Chupacabra turns up again in Cuero, Texas?

And the police officers even have dashcam video this time. How fitting for all this during a summer when the new X Files movie hits theaters.

As reported by CNN:

Messin' with Sasquatch...

If what Matthew Whitton and Tom Biscardi claim is true, the mystery of Bigfoot finally might be solved.

And they have the corpse to prove it.

Whitton, a police officer, and his friend Rick Dyer, a former corrections officer, say they didn't shoot the animal. They found the dead body in the woods of northern Georgia. It is described as 7 feet 7 inches tall, weighing over 500 pounds, having reddish-brown hair or fur, and having feet over 16 inches long.

They stored the body and froze it to keep it from further decay. There are even pictures.

Biscardi, CEO of Searching for Bigfoot Inc. in California, has examined the body and sent the DNA in for testing. The results are in, and the answer is...

Well, we'll have to wait a few more days to find that out. A press conference to be held on Friday at noon in Palo Alto, California will reveal all the answers to this mystery.

The greater question is, if this is the real McCoy, how did he die? Too much beef jerky?

They're Always After Me Lucky Anal Probes...

Floridian Lloyd Deneau, 41, was recently on a vacation to Lake Tahoe, on the California/Nevada border. Like most tourists, he took plenty of photographs.

One seemed to turn up something interesting.

Dubbed by his children as the "leprechaun-alien", the wee three-foot creature turned up in a photograph of the wooded wilderness. Lloyd swears there was no one or thing there at the time he took the photo. It was only after downloading the photos to his computer that the anomaly showed up.

"I have a military background and don’t really believe in aliens," he said, "but I can’t explain this."

Leprechaun, alien, elf, or baby bigfoot? Everyone is speculating yet no one seems to be certain. But I highly doubt the real answer involves a pot of gold...