Sunday, May 29, 2005

Look, Mom! No Clothes!!

Well, we have hit rock bottom in the news department today: a mother is facing criminal charges for hiring a stripper for her son's 16th birthday party. Perhaps I'm completely mental, but I don't understand what's so wrong with this.

What, you say, am I crazy?? No. Hardly.

Sexuality is the most repressed thing in this country. We're taught that sex is a shameful act never to be committed unless it's for the necessity of procreation, sealed with the bond of marriage. HOGWASH! It's a recreational activity to many, not to mention a way of showing love. If sex were truly only to have children, 99% of the sex happening in the world today would cease! What's so wrong with having pleasure in life??

But I digress. Now for the next shocking statement: this particular case has NOTHING TO DO WITH SEX.

Surprised? I thought you might be. Strippers not relating to sex? Allow me to explain.

This all boils down to one thing: nudity. And not even COMPLETE nudity. Now I ask you, what does nudity have to do with sex? This fundamental question is why there are nudists. Our good ol' Puritain ancestors instilled in us the notion that any time someone is naked, it means they are going to have sex or are performing an ultimate sin. How stupid can you get??? Go to any other country in the world and they understand the difference between the naked human body and sex. Why are we still caught in the dark ages?? Nudity is the most natural thing in the world, quite literally. We're simply trained to believe that if we're naked we're vulnerable and should be ashamed and guilt-ridden. To be naked is to be "uncivilized" and "savage". How utterly absurd!

So, back to strippers. What's wrong with a 16 year old boy filled with hormones getting to see a little extra flesh? Probably as much as he sees in a Victoria Secret catalog, if he hasn't borrowed one of his father's stashed pornos? Absolutely nothing. He wasn't raping someone. He wasn't meeting an escort or prostitute. He was going to be fully clothed at all times.

Now I ask you: what's the harm in that?

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