Occult of Personality...

Again, a great amount of time has lapsed since I've taken the time to write. Being back in Ohio has been an interesting experience, to say the least. There have been some good moments which have made me realize what I missed... and more than enough situations which made me think, "Seriously... what was I thinking coming back here? I'd have been better off leaving the Cleveland area a distant memory only seen through a television show!" What little time I've had between returning to mundane day work and battling my ever-determined pursuit of a life free of drama, I'm often too exhausted to think about any long posts... or even find odd news to share with the world. This past weekend was my unpacking-and-getting-my-place-looking-livable days so I feel somewhat more comfortable stepping into a bedroom free of boxes, piles of paperwork, and half-finished projects. But it never ends. Life can be a little overwhelming at times.

Then I asked myself why I neglect my blog as much as I do. And I was surprised to find that I had an answer: change. A decade ago (and even a few mere years ago for that matter) there was so much amusement and enjoyment for me in dealing with the paranormal. It was actually fun more times than not. Investigations were mini adventures with kindred spirits. The Cuyahoga Valley was that magical place I spent my teenage years and some of my happiest memories. There were the occasional bad days but as a whole the journey was a pleasant one.

Then... life changed.

I started looking beyond my own back yard to find places and hauntings, which led to a broader world view and the realization that there is so much life (and death) out there I wasn't exploring. My life went through a series of changes and alterations, each one shifting my perspective and awareness. I began to meet new people, some of whom have become truly wonderful friends and associates. But most of all, the fun frolics turned into contests and drama became the mainstay of that once sleepy hamlet in which I live.

Anyone who watches paranormal television knows there are always behind-the-scenes dramas playing out in paranormal groups and organizations. They just never quite capture the entirety of it in a 30- or 60-minute time slot. Rivalries are rampant and the main reason that advancement NEVER actually happens in the field. It's always about who has the better photograph, who went inside the coolest locale, or what group has the most friends on MySpace or Facebook. It's not about the paranormal, it's about popularity. Who gets to be the regional diva? How do I get the world to notice ME?

So many people want to be famous. Image takes over and obliterates anything else standing in its way. It comes in the form of amassing huge amounts of mediocre-at-best photos and EVPs or distancing yourself from people who aren't a carbon copy of your particular "vision". Really important things like honesty, acceptance, cooperation, and camaraderie are lost in the dust. It's the next Amazing Race or Big Brother. Who can climb their way to the top first and win the grand prize?

The reality is there is no prize. No blue ribbon for hippest spook seeker. No trophy for the best-dressed investigation team. At the end of the day you haven't transformed into Oprah Winfrey. I'm sure some people might say, "HA! But Ken, you wrote Queer Hauntings! Aren't you in it for fame and fortune too, you hypocrite?" The honest answer is no. I don't write to find my name on the New York Times Best Sellers list. I don't to signings and lectures to appease some deep-rooted starvation for affection and admiration. I write about what I find interesting and what I enjoy. I write and do talks to share what I learn with others and to educate people. If I have one person walk up to me and say, "I just wanted to say thank you. You opened my eyes up to a whole new world," then I've succeeded in doing what I set out to do: to make people think.

You might think from all of this that I now hate the paranormal or have banished the whole thing from my mind and life, but that's not the case. I still enjoy the strange and unusual tales and places found in the tiniest recesses of our vast, incredible home called Earth. I love a good ghost story and the history of people, towns, streets, waterways, and buildings. But the mob mentality that comes with being mainstream? That's just not for me. I spent a large portion of my childhood trying to figure out who I was. Another chunk of my years was spent learning to allow myself to be who I was. I'm finally getting to the point where I feel no shame or guilt about being me. My individuality is not negotiable nor will I sell it out to the highest bidder. And being the unique person that I am, I'm entitled to being respected by others for my own originality. I don't ask other people to march in my footsteps (though it has happened in the past on a few occasions). I expect the same decency in return.

Paranormal studies are an examination of freaks. In one sense of another, everything from ghosts to UFOs to bigfoot are freakishly bizarre by their very nature. And those of us in the field can often be described as so as well. But there is nothing wrong with being an oddity, an anomaly. It shows resistance to conformity, the daily battle we all face between who we are and what society wants us to be. If you can honestly say you are truly your own person and unbending to the social and societal waves pummeling you each and every day then give yourself a pat on the back. And remember: you're the only person you have to live with for the rest of your life... and quite possibly beyond that...

Deck the Halls with Bows of Drama...

Every so often, I take a peek at the fascinating drama happening in the paranormal community. The bickering and name-calling, often surrounding people in the media. (Hey at least it's not about me, for once.) After a brief glimpse months ago at a thread surrounding Chip Coffey, I decided to revisit the mudslinging and see what had been said. If I've learned anything it's that time is a wonderful thing. Truth sorts itself out miles down the road.

Now I try to be open-minded to all sides in arguments (which creates issues in itself), and I'm far from a perfect person. I get caught up in the wave of dissent and make a few blunders. I do my best to keep a sense of humor, though, and avoid lambasting people with definitive statements. I see all sides of everything.

For those not "in the know", a woman accused members of Paranormal State of faking results. Wow... isn't that a first? I'm hard pressed to find any group or show that hasn't met controversy. Are the allegations true? Honestly, I have no idea. Depending on who you ask, you'll get a different answer.

While allegations are often plausible, it's the after-effects that end up revealing clues. And in this case, it does strike me strange that someone feeling jilted by free publicity would begin charging people to visit her haunted home. Is it proof positive? No, but a red flag goes up.

People have misconceptions about television and those who appear on a screen. I have known writers, filmmakers, actors, and other individuals in the public eye. Yes, what you see isn't always exact reality. "Improv" can be scripted. Troubles brew on the set. And often, the visible people face the brunt of it all. Anyone who knows the behind-the-scenes workings can tell you that it's a totally different world from what appears to the viewer. Even in "reality television", nothing is as it appears.

An old friend of mine stepped away from the movie world for good in recent years. Seeing all I witness, I know why. It's not about being a bad actor or not finding work. It's about sanity, avoiding rumor mills, and wanting a normal life. And there is no fault in that. If he wants to work at a restaurant and come home to his other half, it doesn't mean "he couldn't cut it" or "has a pathetic life", as some could suggest. Fame has its price. Getting out of the downward spiral and nightmarish hellstorm while you can is wise.

But back to Chip, Ryan, and the drama.

So, what do I believe? I think that there is a lot the general public doesn't know about every single show and film ever made. I believe that truth is relative. And I still have faith that truth wins out over all else. Not a satisfactory answer? Sorry. I have heard so many things about so many people over the years. I've watched message boards fill up with rumors while knowing the truth. I've been called a liar, fake, and charlatan. I have tried to tell the truth to defend people only to be told I was "making it up for fame". Then, when truth finally rears its head, people magically forget that someone had their facts straight.

I know the burning questions people want an answer to: is Chip a fraud? Is Ryan vain? Is the woman a greedy sod? I'm not here to answer those things. I'm here to find amusement in humanity. Our petty babblings and stupid assumptions. I play devil's advocate to test the waters. I have psychic friends who have come under attack (actually, every single one has). I also have friends who felt jilted by celebrities. It bothers me to be forced into the middle, so I refuse to do it. A friend of mine from Florida emailed me about a psychic on television who "stole" his television show idea and ran with it. Since the show is currently on air, I'm not saying another word. But I avoided commenting back about that. They're both adult men and can duke it out themselves. I refuse to take sides with either one. Why? Because I don't have all the facts. I get along with most everyone and intend to stay that way. I'm not here to say which psychic is better than the other.

To be honest, I like Chip. And I give him credit for holding his own with all the trash that goes around. Does that mean that everyone I know, associate with, or befriend likes him? Hardly. But so what? I'm Switzerland. I indulge all sides in their say. Switzerland harbored refugee Jews and laundered Nazi money. Do I agree with everyone? No. But in this world of name-calling and mean words, I tend to keep quiet about my own views. Trying to be friendly with everyone is one of the most difficult tasks in the world. Yet one thing holds true: often, the people who accuse others of certain behaviors and deeds are guilty of the same things. That's why I smile. it's merely a suppressed laugh.

And for those of you who want answers, I'll give you one. You'll probably never know the real answers to these questions. Is psychic X legit and psychic Y a fraud? Find out for yourself. Judge people by their character and compassion and not popularity or rumors. Most of us are undecided on the truth behind psychic ability. Yet I have had things told to me by psychics which ended up being true. I've also had horrible readings that were nothing but trash. I've known arrogant psychics who saw themselves as demigods and hesitant ones who worried about every word they said.

Am I a little biased with who I like? Of course. Aren't we all? I'm not perfect nor am I entirely neutral. Those are two impossibilities in humanity. And I am human... last I checked. I can be lead astray. I make errors in judgement. I put my foot in my mouth. But at least I'm sensible enough to admit it. If I laugh at the world's stupidity, shouldn't I laugh at my own?

I'm Not Dead Yet...

I know it has been a few days since my last post. I've been feeling a bit under the weather so I've avoided writing. I think it's a combination of a cold, recovering from a long and hectic weekend, and the usual stress which reminds me that I'm alive.

I have a lot on my plate at the moment, and so many things to contemplate. That's without the constant cloudy threat of drama that circles above me. Perhaps I'm getting a little burnt out. But when everything is intertwined like some knotted cord, it's not very easy to separate the positive things from the negative.

I'll be getting back to my regular posts again today. I could use the healthy distraction. With so many things to ponder, it may take forever to mentally sort through the mess and get back on a normal keel. But that's life: one big tornado of plans, dreams, buzzing mosquitoes, and flying cows. As much as I'd like to take shelter in some cellar and wait for everything to blow over, there's simply too much shrapnel flying about to find the latch.

Yet I won't allow that happy bubble of mine to be popped for the sake of meaningless rubbish. Life's too short for it. I just need to find my humour again...

Paranormal Investigators: We Know Drama

Many people watch shows like Ghost Hunters and think, "Gosh, that looks like fun! getting together with people, investigating ghosts, having fun... I want to do that too!"

I really wish that were the case.

Yes, investigating hauntings can be fun, rewarding, and sometimes even a bit lucrative. But just as with any hobby or career, it has plenty of pitfalls.

Media, be it print or television, isn't always a blessing. Some reporters misconstrue words and twist storylines to follow their own private agenda. Occasionally, journalists will appear to have the best intentions, but once the story is published it has a negative stance. Reporters will make mistakes. They will use hype to over-dramatize statements, evidence, or tales. It comes with the territory... after all, ratings and good reviews can mean the difference between a feature story and being sent into a hurricane miles away, never to be seen again. There are plenty of decent, well-respected reporters in the world, but that doesn't mean they're all of good character.

Then you have the curious: the visitors and trespassers eager to catch a glimpse of something. In an effort to experience something, some bystanders can get in the way, ruining audio and video with too much "noise" or interfering with serious work. Then you have to contend with the authorities, who won't necessarily believe that you haven't voluntarily brought your own entourage. Some less-than-polite people will take souvenirs or leave marks to show their presence at a location. Ultimately, these actions can terminate any possible work... sometimes permanently. If law enforcement officials or owners feel the property or location is becoming threatened, no one may be allowed to return... even the serious investigators.

Some of the worst damage comes from within. Fellow investigators and group members. Many people may not fully understand the politics involved in most organizations of this nature. People become power-hungry. Disagreements lead to fights and coups. Fairness is forsaken for greed. People want to be equal while dictating demands to everyone else. Feelings get hurt. Feuds break out. Internal struggles tear apart groups and cause people to forget why they do what they are doing. People fail to work as a team... to work together toward a common goal.

Over the last 13 years, I've experiences each of these. Some of them I still experience. This doesn't mean that everyone involved in the world of the supernatural will have issues and problems. If you genuinely are interested in ghosts and aren't out for personal gain or glory, you will do fine. caution is a wise stance to have, both in dealing with the living and the dead. And, of course, a sense of humor can save you from most negative situations.

If you're not in it for the fun, excitement, and satisfaction that comes with hard work, then you just might be in the wrong line of work...