True News is Stranger than Fiction...

It's been a while since I've reported on a few of the weird goings-on around the globe. Luckily it's been a great year for the bizarreness of humanity. Here are just a few stories that fell through the cracks (including a few from Oceania) found inside the Sydney Morning Herald.

Just Looking for a Ghouled Time...

In Durack, Northern Territory a woman named Jennifer Mills-Young has been the victim of what many Australians have labeled a "randy poltergeist." The ghost, given the name Kevin, attacked Jennifer, a mother of two, in her bed while alone in the house, grabbing her wrist and trying to drag her out of bed. "I yelled at Kevin that he was not welcome in my bedroom and that he couldn't come into bed with me. I told him to f--- off and to close the door behind him," Jennifer told a reporter for The Northern Territory News. "A moment later I saw how the bedroom door was closed."  Jason King, a Sydney-based paranormal investigator, has offered his services to help the woman, who was and still remains very skeptical of the paranormal.

Feasting on Misfortune...

There's something rotten in Wellington, New Zealand. Is isn't the corpses. And thanks to an unidentified man it isn't the funeral banquets either. A well-dressed man in his 40s made several stops at Harbour City Funeral Home and similar businesses in the eastern suburbs between March and April to dine on the banquets and take some extra to go. According to the Dominion Post he was stopped after a week by funeral director Danny Langstraat and his staff who felt he had crossed the line. Mentally ill or just looking for a free lunch? We may never know.

A Very Unlucky Number...

People may chalk up the superstitions surrounding the number 13 to coincidence, but one teenager in Suffolk, England may disagree. Friday August 13th proved to be a shocking day for the 13-year-old boy who was attending an air show when a thunderstorm rolled in. A lightning strike hit the boy and two other crowd members at 13:13. "Lightning strikes can cause cardiac arrest," said a St Johns Ambulance volunteer at the event, "but when our volunteers arrived, the boy was conscious and breathing." He was taken to a nearby hospital and treated for burns on his shoulder.

Rook to Alpha Centauri...

Could aliens pose concerns of national security leaks? Possibly in Russia. State Duma deputy Andrei Lebedev wrote to Russian President Dmitry Medvedev in May asking for a full investigation into the alleged alien abduction of multi-millionaire businessman Kirsan Ilyumzhinov on September 18, 1997. On that date, Kirsan reported that a cylindrical craft piloted by "human-like creatures in yellow spacesuits" landed on his balcony and whisked him away to "some kind of star" in an effort to prove the existence of UFOs. Lebedev was concerned that the aliens may have urged him to divulge state secrets to them and asked for proper protocol to be followed when a high-profile figure is abducted. But they might be overreacting a little. Kirsan happens to be the head of the World Chess Federation. Perhaps they just wanted a few pointers in exchange for a tour of the universe?

Strange, But True News...

It's been a while, but here are some news snippets from the past few months collecting dust in my bookmarks. About time I did this again!

The Fork-Bending Truth...

Think the movie Push with its government psychics is a bunch of Hollywood hocus pocus? Think again. Retired Colonel John Alexander recently spoke to Maxim about his experiences with psychokinesis behind closed US Intelligence doors. His experiences made a believer out of him, though they aren't as spectacular as movie special effects. It's enough to make you want to concentrate on your cutlery.

It's Called a 'Wake' for a Reason...

Back in December, Gregory & Carr Funerals in Sydney came up with a new way to attract business. Customers purchasing pre-paid services were entered into a drawing to win an espresso machine. Coffee does tend to bring people together. Just ask any of the hundreds of coffee shops across the globe. But prizes for dying? Too bad the recipient won't have the pleasure of enjoying the brew.

Fairy Troubles...

Petersfield may not have a chance to celebrate mythology this spring. Some council members worry that the event, geared toward children to raise funds for Rainbow Trust, might promote "occult activities". Sorry, kids, we know you're gravely ill but we can't have these metaphysical displays of imagination influencing adults.

Paging Dr. Venkman...

Dan Ackroyd has let the cat out of the bag. Plans are underway for a cast reunion of Ghostbusters for a third film. According to the actor, the script is in the works with filming expected to begin this fall. Akroyd himself is a believer in the paranormal. Let's hope they don't ruin it... maybe they can give George Bush a cameo as "the ghost of Homeand Security".

It's Not Polite to Stare...

A Detroit casino billboard has people talking... and a few unnerved. The advertisement, depicting a pair of gold-colored eyes staring down from a black background shook up a few people, and has one reverend crying "Satan". "It looks like a demon glaring at you," stated Rev. James Smith of Romulus, "nobody with kids in their car should be forced to look at that. No Christian should." It's awful pompous to think the devil would find anything worth having in Detroit these days.

Who Would Jesus Arrest?

The NYPD is facing legal action for placing an officer on desk duty in 2006. And rightfully so, since Dominic Maglione's only offense is seeing a demon and promoting the "word of God". he was hospitalized in 2006 for starving himself "because he was too busy praying". Maglione, an evangelist proclaiming himself "godlike", underwent psychological examination and was found to be bipolar, obsessive-compulsive, and suffering from "hyperreligiosity". I'd say these neurotic behaviors make him fit in quite well on the New York's police force.

Morbid Joyriding, Anyone?

For the first time in over 36 years, you might see more hearses in Malta.

In the past three decades, the government hasn't granted a single license for a hearse, leaving only the existing 11 licenses for the entire country. The Maltese Transport Ministry is calling for a more liberal dispersion of such licenses to avoid a cartel. Competition is healthy, and the cost of transportation for funerals will lower to a more tolerable level.

So while you may not be able to afford living in Malta with the rising cost of living, dying there might become a bit more economical...